TELE-SAUR-TISE! ((((:

4/30/2012 08:45:00 PM

Monday, April 30, 2012

4/30/2012 08:45:00 PM

4/30/2012 08:42:00 PM

16th April 2007, Monday

A day that I'll never ever forget. The very day i know my dad will leave and never come back.

The morning of 16th April 2007,
My sister left for holiday on that very day. She didn't get to see my dad because he was still asleep. when my dad woke up, he rushed out to look for her. A lil too late. His last too. He woke up 30 minutes or so after my sister left for the airport. As per normal, he got ready for work and left. on that very day too, I didn't send him off at the door like I usually did every morning with my cat. At first, I don't understand why my cat doesn't allow him to leave the house that morning. Later, in the afternoon, I knew the reason why. I left for school few minutes after him.

That afternoon,
while I was having my compo common test, but, I had to reject his call. why? Because I know my teacher is an a-hole. He wouldn't let me pick up my call. I know it's urgent because my dad rarely calls me. So, I rushed through my compo and returned his call. He didn't answer my call. Coincidentally, mom called me. She told me my dad called just to say he's not feeling well and thought I was with her and my brother to pick him up from work. I thought okay, that's all? Kind of relief. So as usual, I stayed back in school for awhile. Reached home around five-thirty.

When i got home,

I went to my parents' room to see my dad. Saw him sleeping. My mom said he has been waiting for me to reach home to eat with me. Refusing to go to the hospital or clinic for a check. & he keeps complaining about the pain in his chest. Was about to take my shower when he suddenly got up and just stood there looking at me. Then, he just go take a glass of water and took out the medicine box. He asked me the meaning of certain words from the newspaper. He popped two muscle and joint panadol (when he's actually having chest pain). Don't ask why. I'm not sure myself. When he got up, he suddenly fell. I don't know what I should do. I just call out for my mom. We let him lie flat on the floor and put a pillow under his head. Oh well, I saw my dad's tongue curl, his feet in awkward position. I don't know if I should tell my mom what i saw. Eventually, I didn't. Okay, I did. After everything was over. Called the ambulance. My god, took them so long to arrive because it's the peak period and there's heavy traffic. Mom followed the ambulance. My brother and I follow behind the ambulance in a car. Even with the siren, no one is giving way to us. There's bad traffic in Clementi. Horrible. Cried and cried. My brother asked me to shut because he can't concentrate. Keep telling me everything will be alright. I know it's not going to because I saw his tongue.

Waited really long. When the door swings open, I saw doctor and nurses trying to pump the medicine in/out of his body. Trying to revive him, but, to no avail. The doctor came out and asked us to be prepared and to contact all of our family members. Something is really not right. At seven, my dad is finally pronounced dead.

At that point of time, I don't know what I'm feeling. Other than to cry. Because, at that point of time, only that will make me feel better. It didn't. I couldn't stay in the holding room for long. I keep disappearing. People asking me to calm down and all. How can I when that man lying inside is my dad?
The nurses(?) wheeled him to the mortuary at around nine. Only then, my mom finally decided to tell my sister. She rushed home on that very night with her other friends. She didn't get to see him until the next day.

Supposedly, the doctors thought of performing post-mortem on my dad. To see what really caused his death. I would say, thanks to my cousin's wife. Thankfully for her. Because one of them is her friend. So, yeah.

His body was brought back at around 11, on tuesday. His body cold like ice. I don't see his tummy move like when he was breathing. It feels so different.

That was my last time seeing him. My first time giving him a kiss on his forehead. Everything changes after that. His friends came over to pay their last respect. Telling us about that morning them drinking coffee together and stuff. He passed away one day after he attended an old friend's daughter's wedding. On that very day too, it was first time sharing food with me.

I went back to school, blaming that a-hole teacher for not letting me answer my call. yes, Goh Soon Hua. He thought it's funny. I fell ill. Wasn't strong. I had mild depression (that's what the doctor diagnosed me with). Had counselling for two years in school and once at children's society.

Till now, it feels as though it just happened yesterday. Five years has passed. My prayers still with him. Forever in my heart. Whenever I visit him, I always have something to share with him. Recently, when I visited him, I told him I'll be leaving for China on the 21st of May. (:

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